Pillars of strength...

And I thought I would find no solace here in which I might truly contemplate the events of the year.

Hope is the denial of reality... Or is it?

There have been many times in my life when I have felt hopeless. It is perhaps the most acute pain I may know, founded in frustration and ventless inner rage.

In my stubborn youth, I believed that I could stand alone, that I was strong enough conquer my inner demons with principles. Arrogance convinced me that by sheer determination, I could conquer helplessness itself. When I look back now, I see quite rarely did I stand alone and rarely did I have to stand alone.

Always there were friends, true and dear, lending me support even when I believed I did not want it, and even when I did not realize they were doing it. These are the companions who gave me the strength to continue. These are the companions who helped fight the helplessness, the rage, the frustration.

These are the friends who let me live...