And I Wonder.

A friend called me Byron and SantaKel told Corean that I had 'Hustler Stories' to tell. WTF!!!

Went to Mega Mall today with Buddy 9 to look for a TV for his room. But we went to Chilli's for a late lunch first. Saw an old schoolmate working part time there. Asked for a discount but he couldn't give us one. Ahh at least I tried eh... Had something like a conversation about older women, skanks, tricks and them jezebels which u all don't have to know about ha ha.

Trying to find peeps to go watch Madagascar but everyone seems undecided for now.
Trying to find out why suddenly my friends back from overseas think I have hustler stories to tell.
Trying to find a time when everyone can head for Buddy 9's home for a house session as his folks are away for a few days.

Wondering why suddenly friends have taken such an interest of what I have been up to when they were gone.
Wondering why I get wierd calls in the morning from someone who thinks my grandmother just passed away.
Wondering why am I getting tagged with wierd names lately.

BBQ Dinner And SantaKel Is Lost Forever.

I'm now at my grandma's house, almost unable to move because I have made an absolute pig of myself indulging in a rather delightful BBQ dinner because it is my uncle's birthday. It's such a shame that I pigged out too much too early. Lamb with thick mint sauce, chicken with super gravy, baked potatoes, prawns, corn on the cob, squid... I thought I was being spoiled for choice. but as my dumb luck would have it after I finished and felt like exploding, they decided to tell me that there was steak and smoked fish as well. WTF! Why couldn't they tell me earlier! So I just sit there and practically sulk while the rest of the family enjoyed *bleh...

Went to Bar Blonde yesterday night. It's been quite a while since we went out to party. Was nice to see AJ again and her sis Brenda after so long. Buddy 9 got pwned by Sharon in drinking games. Disappointing I must say, so we decided to give him a chinese name haha. But it was fun hanging out again, and I even managed to talk lovely Sharon to take me to Burger King to bungkus some food before we went back ho ho!

Part of a conversation with a friend of mine who has totally lost it...


SantaKel - GO GO POWER RANGERS!

Me - Ha ha WTF? Where did that come from?

SantaKel - Lol I just downloaded the song... ahaha, nostalgia beb.

Me - Suddenly I'm not too sure about you. Listening to Power Rangers and calling me beb...

SantaKel - Please. I also have The A-Team theme, Voltron, Thundercats and even My Little Pony.

Me - You're totally losing it. Joyce's influence is getting to you. Soon you'll behaving fairy tattoo's on you as well.

SantaKel - Hardly. She listens to gay guitarish shyte, while I listen to real macho theme songs.

Me - My Little Pony... ?

SantaKel - ... um... yeah.






* Happy Birthday Nik Ina Naslisa!

Boring, Boring Friday.

I went home at 6.30 am in the morning. WTF! And woke up at 11 am WTF AGAIN!!!

Well, woke up today and found out that Buddy 9 discovered that I had changed his nickname last night and decided that his nickname today would be "Farker! Tims A Stalker!". I don't know where he got that from. Usually he calls me pimp or playa. No idea where he got those from either.

Will be heading back to Bangsar later to meet up with Yahooo, Diana, Mabuksss, Buddy 9, Han G and most prob StRyKeR and Tipsy. And I thought that it was gonna be another boring Friday night. No plans, no nothing till I got the call. Thank God for friends.

Corean is back from Scotland. The dude might be off to Zouk tonight but I don't really fancy going unless it's for Ghetto Heaven. And I haven't even gone for that in quite a while. I really need to get a life soon. Bumming in a cyber cafe most of the time isn't very productive and savings will soon be running short. So yes, I need to look harder for a job.

The insanely beautiful ladies will be back soon. Lady Lyn from Ireland, Munster, Munchkin and Vampress from Perth. I can almost picture the havoc, but still they're all fabulous great gals. Will be fun hanging out with them again.

Nothing really much to write about today... Perhaps my outing with my mates will prove more eventful.

What's In A Nick?

Nic, Nain and I were fooling around with our MSN nicknames...

Mine - Nic Wants To Bear My Kids And Nain Wants To Nurse Them!

Nic - Tim And Nain Want Me So Bad!

Nain - Tim And Nic Are Fucking Good Looking!


I think only Nain's nick speaks the truth.

A Very Special Lady.

Sitting dressed in white looking at her surroundings. How convenient it was that there was a spotlight just above her. Looking so much like an angel out of heaven. I don't know why I did it... but somehow I found myself shaking her hand and introducing myself. I knew her brother a while before I even laid eyes on her. Strange how I never asked or spoke top her before that. Little did I know I was introducing myself to a person who would mean so much to me and inevitably be so very much part of my life.

I didn't pay much attention to her at first, but the something about her caught my eye as I saw more of her. I started conversations, asked her out for drinks and supper. The more time I spent with her the more fond I became of her. Strong, passionate, talented and simply beautiful. The only problem is that she didn't believe any of it. I wasn't one to let her lack of self confidence deter her from fulfilling her potential, and I saw a lot of it in her. She was always one I could share my problems with. Through troubled and hard times she was always a person I could turn to when others had turned their backs on me. We had our problems as well but I am thankful that I did not let my temper get the better of me. I don't even want to wonder what would have become between us if we didn't have a very important talk at one point when we were going through a very bad patch in our friendship. But through it all it only made our relationship and understandings for each other stronger.

How I miss those conversations with her on her balcony. How I still laugh at the times when she and her brother nearly got caught by their mom for smoking in the house and they point their fingers at me instead of admitting their faults. The walks, the talks, the smiles, the laughs and the tears along with those little things that didn't seem to matter but still had meaning to me. Years have passed since I first met her. She has become everything I believed she would be. She might thank me for being there for her but my role was just a small part. It was all her if she just believed... and she does now. What a person she has become. Beautiful without comparison in my eyes, as loving as any person I know and wonderful in every way. Strong and confident, beautiful and kind, intelligent and humble.

I can't imagine my life without her. Days, months and years to come she will always still be on my mind and forever engraved in my heart. She will always have my love, trust and support because no matter what path life takes me through she will always be my friend, one who I can depend on. My sister, one who loves and cares like no other. My family, one who is there for me in my darkest times and looks for the best qualities in me. Never will I turn my back on her, never will I forsake her, never will I forget her. I will always love her and hold her dearly in my heart. Always Darlin...

Let It Rain.

Rain, rain and more rain... just wonderful. Now if it would only stop!

Buddy 9 told me of a funny conversation he had with StRyKeR earlier today.


S - Hey bro, when u come out later can I hitch a ride from you?

B - Eh, why suddenly you don't want to drive out?

S - No la I can't use my car.

B - Oh, why can't u use your car?

S - Because I need to go for my haircut later.

B - WTF?? What does that have to do with you not using your car?

S - Oh Shit! I mean I can't use it because later my mom might want to use it.


I have been asked to put up a tag board. Hmm... perhaps when I'm not feeling so lazy.

Episode III... *Sigh...

Star Wars Episode III was dissapointing... I should have known better... Even with todays technology, trying to make the recent 3 Star Wars movies come close to the originals is such a joke. The subtitles were jokes as well. Any idiot would know that R2 isn't bloody spelled Artoo. In fairness Episode III wasn't a total letdown. Lots of explosions, light saber fights and cool characters ran amok in the sequences which led to the coming of Darth Vader. And when he did arrive I really felt like and will smack George Lucas in the face if I ever do see him.

Here we have arguably the most wickedly sick, cool, no mercy, don't f*ck with me if you know whats good for you villain in movie history and they turned him into some pussy who shouts "Nooooooooo...!!" just shortly after he emerges. Guess that's what really ruined the show for me. WTF MAN!!! Where's the aura of invincibility about him from the other films? He doesn't even look intimidating. I felt like shouting "Noooooooo...!!!". F*uck man I could have played a better Vader. I should write to Mr. Lucas with a letter titled 'Refund to the Sith'. Other than that the movie is pretty much just average to me. Nothing there really captured me and no chance in hell in gonna come close to watching it anytime within the next 5 years. I shall seek out episodes 4, 5 and 6 and attempt to salvage something from my shattered views on Darth Vader.

Man United lost the English FA cup on penalties after dominating for long periods of the game. They just didn't finish... The story of their season...

A Little Time Spent In Town.

I had to go to KL today to meet up with Buddy 9 because he wanted someone to accompany him as the poor guy felt lonely and no one wanted to tag along with him to repair his phone. This made me remember all the reasons I don't like goin to KL by myself. The inconsiderate people, long waits, baking heat, hassle and bad smell. And that's just by taking the LRT. The dumb lady at the counter wasn't too bright or helpful either...

Tim - Ticket to Ampang please.

Dumb Lady - Sorry the train doesn't go to Ampang.

Tim - Er... Ampang Point?

Dumb Lady - Sorry no.

Tim - Ampang Park?

Dumb Lady - Ticket to Ampang Park costs 2 ringgit.

Tim - ...


Buddy 9 decided to buy me lunch because I'm such a great guy. Sent his phone for repair and then we could not decide on what to do with our spare time till when we had to pick it up. Eventually we decided to go check out the video arcades and see if anything is new there as it had been ages since we played any arcade games.

As our dumb luck would have it, just as we wanted to change some cash into small change to play some of the games a raid was conducted by some city officials. WTF?!? We've been in there for like 2 minutes and a raid takes place? K... fine we thought no big deal as they asked for out Id for inspection... No small change to play the games... Not allowed to leave even though we were waaaaaaaaay past the age limit to enter that outlet... So we just sat down there and waited and waited and waited for an hour or so... Making dumb jokes about asking them if we can get free play out of this ordeal. Eventually they returned our ID's and we decided to f*ck off from there and get Buddy 9's phone.

The misery didn't end there... traffic jam... nuff said...

*Update - Vinnie Jones as Juggernaut in X Men 3 is such a joke!

Star Wars Episode III Might Just Ruin My Weekend.

I just realized something... Star Wars Episode III...The tickets I got up early for... The tickets I spent most of the morning lining up to purchase with StRyKeR... The time I spent waiting and waiting and even wanted to smack some stupid lady for trying to cut the queue when I held her spot for her when she went to the restroom... I just noticed something... THE MOVIE CLASHES WITH THE MAN UNITED VS ARSENAL 2005 FA CUP FINAL! ARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH...!!! Actually I should be able to catch one half of the match... Guess it won't be a total lost...

Such as life would have it I found out yesterday that one of my old schoolmates is Buddy 9's distant cousin. Funny how I spent a lot of time with her when I was in high school and Buddy 9 after I finished high school. 7 years... and now I find out that they're related. Quite a surprise for me. Not a bad one... but a surprise nonetheless. The three of us should hang out some time. Would be fun too see what they have to say about each other, or me...

And I Wait... And Wait...

8.15 am - Receive a call from StRyKeR asking me to wake up and accompany him to Mid Valley to purchase Star Wars episode III tickets. Says he'll be at my place in 10 minutes.

8.30 am - I'm outside my house, TiMStoNeD, smoking on my first cigarette of the day. StRyKer hasn't arrived.

8.45 am - I'm still outside my house, now smoking on my second cigarette of the morning, still TiMStoNeD. StRyKeR still hasn't arrived.

8.55 - Dumb ass finally makes it to my house.

So much for him being at my place in 10 minutes...

*Update - He claims that I exageratted and that he arrived at 8.50 am...WOW!

A Trip Down Memory Lane.

As I lay on my bed browsing through the various magazines I had, thoughts of a person very dear to me suddenly lingered in my mind. Maybe it was because of the songs being played on the radio, perhaps it was because I was feeling in a very sentimental chill out mood, or most probably because I was looking at pictures of girls haha.

Suddenly past memories of my high school days with her come to mind. Funny how it is that we had been in the same school since primary and never really noticed or spoke to each other till we were about 15. I can't recollect how we first got acquainted. Maybe I asked her for some notes, to lend me her eraser or something as she sat behind me in class, but however it was the beginning of a friendship I still value above most I have even today.

We grew into best friends over time. We had each others trust and support, something unthinkable at the time as I was practically a delinquent and she the total opposite. Eventually we started dating. It grew to a point where we were probalby inseperable, and who could blame us. Our school hours were spent together and even after, I'd walk her home most of the time and then visit her again later in the evenings rain or not. Our Saturdays were spent together with or without friends but that never bothered me. All that seemed to matter was that she was there. Soon there were rumors about that we were actually an item. Perhaps that was the case but I don't think we ever made if official. I never needed to tell her how much I adored her. She knew it well enough, such was our understanding of each other.

The next 2 years that followed are probably the fondest memories I have of my school years. We joined the same clubs, went on the same school trips, exchanged gifts and cards, and shared some wonderful times together... and I guess that every one of those memories are sealed somewhere in my memory just because she was there.

As time passed and school was about to come to an end, we decided to just stay friends. We took the decision to live our separate lives as we wanted. I never felt hurt, betrayed or even a bit of anger, because somehow I knew that she was true to her words that we would still be the best of friends. True to her words, it's been about 7 years since then... our meetings have been few and far apart. I still leave her little messages on her birthday, Valentines, Christmas, Hari Raya and the occasional "Hi. How've you been?". And she never fails to respond in the same way she did all those years back.

I sent her a message last night when I thought about her, reminding her that her birthday was coming up as well. She thanked me and simply replied with this...

FRIEND.

F - Finds ways to comfort you.
R - Remembers you always.
I - Inspires you.
E - Enjoys life with someone like you.
N - Never forgets you.
D - Dies for you.

I thanked her for that. Wished her the sweetest of sweet dreams and a pleasant night and likewise from her. I afford her a little smile and go to bed several hours later.

I looked up something earlier today. It was the last card and picture I ever received from her. In the picture there she is, simply beautiful without comparison with a smile so irresistible it could melt anyones heart.

And in the card... something that never fails to make me smile whenever i read it...

Behind the house a garden lies and a tiny table waits,
With coffee cups and bowls of fruit and little raisin cakes.
Down through the years we've stayed close friends though near or far apart,
And you will always have a special place in the garden of my heart.

Your friendship means so much to me.

And at the end of it she wrote... " A friend loves at all times."

From the day that we met till now, she has been true to those words. And I thank her for it.

I Need A Life.

As I sit here in a corner of a cyber cafe with the sound of DoTa blasting all around me I wonder how is it possible that I myself am not playing along with them. I have decided to stop my current job as an assistant to a project manager and look toward greener pastures instead of steel n rubble. I have been asking and looking about for possible jobs that I feel would suit me better. One of them is possibly a career in the line of advertising. It catches my interest and hopefully will materialize into something more than just that.

It's been a pretty uneventful day so far. I was just laming about at home till suddenly I received a call from Tipsy telling me that StRyKeR and her were at Hartamas. I'm like "Ok... So you just called me to tell me that?" Apparently Buddy 9 told them that I had nothing to do and that I wanted to go out. The funny thing is that I haven't spoken to anyone the whole day, and here I have someone who's making plans for me. And I actually went along with it... Hence why I am out, still bored and wondering why I even bothered to come out in the first place.

I don't even feel like playing DoTa now. I think I've had a little too much of it lately. *Sigh...


Part of a conversation I had with a friend on Msn.

Friend - I'm high at the moment.

Tim - Go take some sugar and coffee.

Friend - No sugar! No Coffee! I'm high on chili! Hahaha!

Tim - Take only. It would be interesting to see how hysterical you might become.

Friend - You do not want to know. You might just get scared. Trust me.

Tim - As long as you don't hit my cap or on the head like Tipsy does then I figure I should be fine.

Friend - Nah, that's too juvenile for me. I'd probably sock you in the nuts.


And she was right after all. Suddenly I am scared. Violent women these days...

Mackers And A Hungry Friend.

I'm now sitting in my friends house with nothing to do, no inspiration whatsoever to blog at all and yet I find myself writing in my blog right now. Actually I figure it to be more toward ranting and bitching.

Firstly I got practically dragged out to follow my friend to HELP Institute just so he could have company while he goes there to collect his transcript... which he was supposed to collect 3 weeks ago. Usually I wouldn't object to keeping a mate company, but then again it was raining and the thought of getting soaked in it wasn't part of my plans. K... fine we reach HELP, I'm a little drenched and he forgets where the side entrance is. So here we are walking into all possible exits we see in hope that perhaps one of them might lead us down to the admin / registry area. Now I haven't been to HELP in years and have a faint recollection that there was a side entrance in the building next to where the Mackers is... but no we had to decide to keep wandering about like mindless zombies.

Eventually we did find the damn entrance... Yes, it was in the building next to where we were like I recalled. So there goes like 10 - 15 minutes of my time wasted. Ahh well at least the rain had stopped by then. I decided to be bitchy and complain a few times to my friend about the rain, our time being wasted and how there seemed to be no decently attractive looking girls about. After collecting his transcript we had to buy lunch for his bro. Guess he felt a lil bad by now after all my ranting and he decided to treat me to some chicken nuggets and a coke from Mackers. Sweet.

So back to his place we went and here I am sitting down at his pc sipping on my coke, munching on my nuggets and rubbing it in to another friend whom I'm chatting with now because he's hungry and has no transport to go and buy his lunch. I offer him to come on over to where I am because it's no that far from where he stays, but he decides to be lazy and asks if we could come get him, take him to buy food and then send him back. Right...Temptation finally got to him and he has decided to make himself some instant noodles after calling my friend and I "F*uckers" for teasing him about his desperation for food.

Friend - Stop playing games and lets go Mc D's again!

Tim - Nah... We're busy munching on the nuggets.

Friend - You F*ckers!

Tim - Told you to come over right?

Friend - No transport!

Tim - Public transport is quite reliable you know.

Friend - No way!

Tim - Mmm... Nuggets with BBQ sauce...

Friend - !#$%!%^$!

Tim - Ah yes... We have KFC, burgers, french fries and coke as well.

Friend - ... Bye! I'm goin to cook myself some Maggi noodles.

Tim - Lol. Hahaha enjoy!


Star Wars Episode III is out soon. Hope it's alot better than that rubbish we got for part 2. Actually I don't really care. I'm just looking forward to Charlie And The Chocolate Factory and Corpse Bride. If Corpse Bride turns out to be anything like The Nightmare Before Christmas I'm so gonna go nuts. No idea why I'm so fascinated with stop motion animation. I just am.

Man United Not For Sale.

I think by now the whole football world should know of the events that have taken shape regarding Manchester United and it's takeover by some leprechaun looking person who goes by the name of Malcolm Glazier. Many people have expressed their disappointment as a club whom many have loved and supported for most if not all their lives have suddenly been stolen from them by some American tycoon who probably thinks that he is above all those who have put in so much dedication, time and money into making Man United one of the greatest clubs in the world. I myself as a Manchester United fan of 15 years am a little taken back by this, and am very disappointed.

I do feel that Malcolm Glazier has every right to pursue his ambitions whatever they may be with Man United, but taking control over a club in which he has no affiliations with in the first place just pisses me off. I always believed that a football club should always belong to the community that surrounds it. The people that make it what it is and gives it it's identity. The passion, love and support for a club cannot be rivaled or bought. Thinking that people are stupid when he claims to be an avid fan of the club when he has never... not once attended a game or shown any kind of support for the club is just an insult to those who are.. The money is certainly there to be made, but so is the possibility of leading the club into ruin.

Some might argue that the same thing happened to Chelsea. But then again Chelsea was then a club with massive debts mounting up and Roman was gladly accepted by its fans when he stepped in with his billions to save the club. Man United on the other hand was just recently confirmed as the riches club in the world yet again and had no need for anyone to come in and change everything. Suddenly from being the richest club in the world Manchester United is staring at debts possibly mounting to as much as 300 million pounds. That in itself gives the fans plenty to worry about and they have voiced their discontent that the club might be led into ruin.

The fans are doing the best they can although it seems inevitable that the club will fall into the hands of one man and his overwhelming ambition to add to his already impressive fortune. But I admire them for their effort. True fans always will stand up and shout for the club which they love and I salute them for it. Only time will tell whether Malcolm Glazier will lead Manchester United onto greater heights, or almost certain oblivion.

And A Restless Mind Wanders...

As I sit here smoking on my cigarette with possibly a million things running through my mind I begin to wonder about the events which suddenly have gotten me to think so deeply regarding myself, friends and family. In the past it never did bother me whether or not people thought of me as something or nothing. All that mattered to me was that I live my life the way I want to with or without people's support or interest. Those who know me better could possibly think that I'm a great person who goes along with anything at anytime and is always there when they need me. That may be true to a certain extend. Recently I have gotten in contact with some people who I had totally forgotten over time and suddenly old feelings creep in. Fond memories of things we shared before and bonds that at one point I thought were so great they could never be broken... and yet they have. I'm now on my way to rebuilding those bonds which I let loose. Because they matter.

Sometimes people ask me who is my best friend... and I answer that I don't consider anyone to be my best friend. Because to me, friends are friends and I don't see any reason to draw lines on how much I should help one friend or another just because the word 'best' is included. But I do however find it more and more difficult to keep promises and obligations to many and end up opting for alternatives which sometimes leaves the other party disappointed with my decisions. I do play favorites, but then again I guess we all do. Not that it was ever my intention to disappoint, but I guess sometimes I'm just selfish and somehow try and bend matters to suit my liking or convenience. And suddenly now here I am thinking what about those who matter to me? About those who should matter to me? Have I been a friend to them? What would I be now without some of them? Would I be happy? Feel appreciated? Or just end up as someone they once knew? I do fear for the latter... but know thats it's well within my capabilities to be someone they can look for love, trust and support. And i shall utilize it to the best for myself and those around me. Because I can.

One of the most common questions that come across me is how is it that I don't have someone to call my girl. My answer is usually that I end up in between 'Relationship' and 'Friends'... and perhaps am just too chicken shit to take any chance to making that mean anything more or better in fear that I might lose everything with that person. I do miss companionship... yet somehow I do not long for it. Could it be that past mistakes and events have possibly made me cold and insensitive toward affection that I just can't be bothered to at least make a little effort to be with someone. I do say at times that I am just fussy with girls but then again... most of my friends who i hold dearly in little places in my heart are girls, one different from the other... how does that justify 'fussy'? Perhaps it's a little lack of self confidence that I have allowed to build up over time that discourages me from making any attempt at a relationship, and yet I do nothing about it... I know I'm so much bolder than what i make of myself. Perhaps now I should believe in it just a little more. Take a chance, take a risk and who knows? I might end up happier than I've ever been in years. Because I will.

It's time to make some changes in my life. Everything I need I have. Just have to take that leap into the unknown and find my place in that big wonderful mystery I call life. Because I'm living it!